Tag Archives: humor

PLL S4 Ep 14: Who’s in the Box

Let’s see, where did we leave off?  I watched the Halloween episode in a bar, so my memory is fuzzy.  AH! I remember, last episode was kinda just like whatever, except for Hanna’s heaving titties, those were exceptional. Basically it was just an excuse to plug the new not as good show, Ravenswood. Later, Caleb!  There was a huge bombshell at the end of the episode that Alison’s is alive! Also, Ezra might be A!  That makes him even hotter if you ask me.

God, lots of stuff happened.  Anyway so Alison isn’t dead! Who is buried in her place? That is what the girls are trying to figure out.  Hanna has some theories and actually gets a gold star this episode.  She actually steps up and gets shit done!  She does get some points knocked off for pronouncing the word gazebo, gayz-bow, and for wearing really terrible pants during her crinkled cry face break up scene with Caleb, but overall, she was aces.  She actually did a google search for girls who may have disappeared near Rosewood around the time Alison “died”. She found a girl named Sara Harvey that vanished who was JUST LIKE ALI!  Complete with a set of friends just like our Pretty Little Liars.  Hanna sets up a meeting with a couple of the girls and the casting people get kudos for finding actresses that are just THAT much less good looking than the main actresses to really highlight their ridiculous beauty.

PicMonkey Collage

Pretty, but not AS pretty.

All right.  I am already behind, as the new episode aired yesterday and I haven’t even watched it yet!  I instead watched Now and Then with my lady friends, ate adult chocolate pudding soup, and talked about butt sex.  Don’t worry! I will watch it today, and the recap will be out by the end of the week.  RELAX EVERYONE!  Anyway, since I am so behind, I will just highlight some important points instead of a full recap.

  • I love how bitchy Spencer is.  She was outright incredulous that Hanna had theories about what happened with Ali, and I like it!  She looked really lovely this episode.  Bitch face really works for her.
  • What is the world is going on with Toby’s (Blackberry Mouth) hair?  I mean I get what he’s going for, but dude you are not pulling it off.  You look like Pat Sajak, in a bad way.
Pretty Little Liars, Toby

Nope.

  • For some reason, Emily told Paige that her and Ali had kissed and Paige got all butthurt about it.  Good.  I don’t like Paige.  I hope she is A and ends up falling off a cliff or something dramatic like that.
  • Ezra and Aria kissed! He wants another chance after she graduates from high school.  LIKE I HAVEN’T HEARD THAT ONE BEFORE.  Is he A?  What is in that weird trap door thing in his friend’s house?  What is going on with Aria’s wardrobe?  Who wears this many ruffles to school? Alls I know is I hope Jake is out of the picture, because he was the most boring boyfriend in the history of television.

ariaruffles

  • This episode had so many sighs, and most of them came from Spencer’s dad, Mr. Hastings.  Do grown men sigh that much in real life?
  • During the episode ABC Family had different hashtags they wanted the public to use during the episode.  We created our own, #PLLSIGHS due to all the above mentioned sighing, and during a scene with Mona and Ezra, in which Mona really unsubtly hinted that she knows he is leading a double life, the hashtag was #MonaKnows.  Best tweet of the night:

It’s okay Mona.  We all want that D.

  • Sigh, Hanna’s pants, Hanna’s pants, Hanna’s pants.  I talked about them earlier, but here is a picture.  Is this the last thing you want your boyfriend to see before he has to go deal with supernatural shit in another town? No.  The answer is no.

hannapants

It’s no wonder that Caleb was crying all over his steering wheel.

And that’s all for episode 14!  I am sorry this week was a cop out.  See y’all soon with a full recap of episode 15.  Thanks to Wetpaint for the gif!

–Letty

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TWIST MY ARM WHY DON’T YOU. Welcome Pretty Little Liars.

I have been watching Pretty Little Liars for the entirety of its existence and have even re-watched seasons because I love it so.  Those girls are just so damn pretty, and SO SO dumb, that I cannot resist it.  But I have been reluctant to cover it here because it is a really complicated show, and I have little to no stick-to-itiveness, as evidenced by my lapse in The Carrie Diaries coverage. (It just got too earnest for me! I will bring it back I promise!)  Recently, due to the creation of the Pretty Little Drinkers (my friends and I watching PLL in a bar), I have had a change of heart.  I will now start doing drunken recaps of PLL for your reading pleasure.  They will not be overly detailed and may focus a lot on the girls’ sartorial choices, but IT’S BETTER THAN NOTHING, RIGHT?  Episode 1 of Season 4 coming soon!

–Letty

Teenagers forever!

Teenagers forever!

An Open Letter to Pretty Little Liars

Dear Pretty Little Liars,

Temptress, delilah, enchantress,  JEZEBEL!  You have tried to woo me with your lustrous locks, beautiful waterfalls of glorious hair that cascades majestically down around creamy, nubile shoulders.  You almost convinced me to grow my hair out.  ALMOST. Having long hair goes against all of my natural instincts, as I am an adorable pixie, but this is hard to resist:

~~such hair~~

Could that be me?  Could I possibly have such divine, long tresses?  The answer is no.  It was always no Pretty Little Liars, and you knew it the whole time.  You had me convinced for months that I could have long hair and I know now that it’s NEVER GOING TO HAPPEN.  You are as deceitful as A.

I had this epiphany as I was cleaning out a clog in the shower drain after a guest with lovely Rapunzel hair washed her glorious strands.  I was super grossed out and decided I just couldn’t deal with the clogs that goes along with having long hair.  I also don’t like the way that long hair sometimes creates a sort of webbing across the back and shoulders, as it gives me mad heebie jeebies.  This is not a problem that afflicts you Pretty Little Liars, only ladies that stand in front of me in the grocery store checkout line.

THE SPELL HAS BEEN BROKEN PRETTY LITTLE LIARS, the charade is UP, and I will be cutting my hair soon.  You have made me look like a fool.  I told people, I told EVERYONE that I was growing my hair out. IT DIDN’T EVEN MAKE IT PAST MY SHOULDERS. It is not even as long as Caleb’s hair. Ironically, only now I have joined your ranks because I have become  a pretty (cute at best) little (height wise at least) liar!   My recommendation, feature a character with short hair, if only to appease me and your many pixie haired fans.

Have a good day Pretty Little Liars, stay beautiful and BE SAFE.

Love,

L